Wakeup Call
by lyviel
Summary: Doctor Richard Galen came to Andromeda for a new beginning. He wasn't sure what he expected to find here but it certainly wasn't Harry Carlyle. Doctor Harry Carlyle x Original Character
1. Chapter 1

Doctor Richard Galen had never been a morning person. Even after over 600 years of sleep he still felt like death when they pulled him out of cryo, the world a blurry haze, and there was nothing on his mind except coffee. Well, he would have liked something a bit stronger, but that would have to wait; he'd be going on the clock soon. He knew the symptoms of extended cryo and what to look out for, but it was standard protocol to have another doctor check him out, so Rich just sat there at the edge of one of the beds, drinking coffee as he answered the other doctor's questions automatically.

He was on cup number three when he was finally left alone to recover after his checkup and, slowly but surely, the world was coming back into proper focus. It was strange to think that they were no longer in the Milky Way, far from anything familiar. Sure, this is exactly what he had wanted, but it was still hard to get his mind around. Deep thinking wasn't exactly his strong suit, however, so he decided to focus on his surroundings instead.

There were only a handful of people milling about, mostly doctors Rich had met before cryo. There was a big monitor on the far wall cycling through images, one even of a tropical landscape intended to depict one of the possible places humanity might be able to settle in Andromeda. Rich couldn't help but scoff. It was all bullshit, of course. There was no way to predict what would truly await them here and Rich doubted they'd be that lucky. The only purpose the image really served was enticing people to join and keeping spirits up. Rich took another generous sip of coffee burning his mouth a little but he didn't particularly care.

"Better take it easy," another doctor said as he walked passed, heading to the coffee pot located conveniently next to Rich's bed. "There's going to be quite the line to the bathrooms here pretty soon once we start waking more people up."

Rich's mind was too sluggish at the moment to really respond, but he drained his cup anyway as he searched his memory for the man's name. Harry Carlyle? That sounded right. They hadn't really had a chance to talk before they left. He held his empty cup out and the doctor laughed. Once he'd finished filling his own cup, he filled Rich's as well and headed back to his patient.

Rich only had a few minute left before he needed to get back to work so this time he tried to actually enjoy his last cup of coffee. At least the irritableness was beginning to subside. A little, anyway. His default was still generally grumpy. He looked around the room again, paying attention to where the different supplies were kept as well as watched the people, noting his new colleagues.

Somehow he kept finding his gaze pulled back to Carlyle though. The first thing Rich noticed about him was how soft he was, especially with his patients. Well, that wasn't true, the first thing Rich noticed was how attractive he was, but he was trying not to acknowledge that. Carlyle had a gentle way of teasing people to make them feel more at ease, yet there was also a slight sharpness and wit there in the way that he occasionally pushed a joke just a little too far, his deadpan delivery making him difficult to read in a way that Rich greatly appreciated.

Rich caught himself staring at Carlyle's jawline and forced himself to look back down at his mug. What was he doing? He'd only been awake for a few minutes and he was already crushing on one of his coworkers. Not exactly the best way to start his new life here. He had too many other things he needed to be focusing on right now. He should really get to his station and prepare for his first patient. He set his mug aside and stood up gingerly, trying not to groan at the stiffness in his muscles. He was definitely too old to make anymore 600 year journeys across space so this trip had better have been worth it. For good or ill, he was stuck with this life now.

* * *

The loud crash and the sudden loss of gravity definitely took Rich by surprise. He flailed about more than he'd like to admit and narrowly avoided hitting his head when the system was reset and gravity returned. He groaned, sore and bruised from the hard landing, something popping unpleasantly and he stood. At least his patient seemed fine. Rich scanned the room, but there seemed to be minimal injuries. Although he couldn't help but notice the grin Doctor Carlyle shot him before he got back to work.

Hopefully that wasn't going to be a regular occurrence. He didn't exactly want to spend his days making a fool of himself and coming away with more bruises. Lots of people were asking what had happened, but Rich just doubled down, focusing on his work and making sure his patients were doing fine. He knew how the military operated; they wouldn't be getting any proper information for a while. The next time he managed to get a break, he went straight for the coffee pot unable to resist another cup. He'd only taken one sip when a voice behind him took him by surprise.

"Looks like you got a few flips in back there," Carlyle said and Rich was just glad he didn't choke on the coffee.

"I hope you enjoyed it because there will not be a repeat performance," Rich said, stepping out of the way so Carlyle could get at the coffee pot as well. "I'm getting too old for stunts like that."

"It was very impressive," Carlyle said, chuckling. "I hope you didn't hit the ground too hard."

Rich couldn't help but get distracted by how pleasant it sounded. He had a gentle voice, deep and calming, one you couldn't help but trust and Rich felt a pleasant warmth in his chest at the sound. _Stop it,_ he told himself _. Focus. I came here to work, flirting isn't going to help, it'll just bring more disappointment and heartache._

"My old bones will definitely be feeling it for a while," Rich said, thankful he wasn't prone to blushing. "So, any idea what the plan is for the rest of the day? It doesn't sound like we have too many more sleepers to wake up."

"I don't know about you but I'm going planetside shortly," Carlyle said, flashing him a smile.

"Ah, part of the Pathfinder team, then? I didn't realize I was in the presence of such an important person."

"I'm really not," Carlyle said, laughing again. "I'm just there in case someone stubs their toe."

"Well, while you're out there having fun, we'll be here doing all the real work. Just do us all a favor and make sure they don't set up shop in a swamp or something. Not exactly the best place for an outpost."

"Make sure they set up in a swamp, got it," Carlyle said with another smile as he set his empty cup down and headed for the exit with a friendly wave.

Rich watched him go, hoping he and the others would all make it back in one piece. But then, when did these sorts of things every go smoothly?

* * *

It was late as Rich made his way down the corridor, although you couldn't exactly tell from the lights. They were always kept bright, simulating sunlight for those working opposite shifts, but it definitely confused one's internal clock. He was exhausted, though, and he would be sleeping except he'd left his jacket in the med bay. Maybe his memory was going. Either way, he was sure he'd forget it entirely if he didn't grab it now so sleep would have to wait.

As the doors to the med bay hissed open, he was surprised to see Carlyle there apparently deep in thought. He looked surprised at being interrupted and rubbed at his face quickly, either trying to get himself to return to reality or compose himself. Not exactly a good sign.

"Didn't expect to see you back so soon," Rich said lightly, pretending not to notice as he went to retrieve his jacket, giving him a bit more privacy if he needed it.

"Yes, well, I guess out here things never quite go as planned," Carlyle said distractedly.

"Things went that well, did they?" he asked sarcastically.

"Habitat 7 isn't going to be our new home if that's what you mean."

"Well, I'm sure you'll find us some place better," Rich said. He stood awkwardly, not sure if he should leave, but Carlyle spoke before he could decide.

"Someone else will be doing that. I'm too old for all this. I'm not sure when that happened but I guess it's better I realize is now. A lot went down out there. We lost a lot of good people. There are better hands than mine they should be relying on."

"I seriously doubt that," Rich said automatically. He wasn't exactly one for this type of encouragement, but somehow he couldn't help himself. Besides, he'd read all the other doctors' qualifications before joining up and his was definitely the most impressive so hopefully this wasn't all sentimentality. "If I ever stub my toe, I'd rather you be the one to patch me up. Still, if you think it's best. I know I've been too old for all that excitement for a long while now."

"I'm pretty sure I'm older than you," Carlyle said with the hint of a smile and that made Rich more relieved than it should have.

"Not by much You wanna talk about what happened out there?"

"I suppose you'll be hearing about it soon enough," Carlyle said with a sigh. "The Pathfinder is dead."

Ah. The words fell from Carlyle as if he had been trying to hold it back but couldn't any longer. They sat heavily in the air and Rich new the implication was that Carlyle hadn't been able to save him. They were both doctors, they knew they couldn't blame themselves for every death if they wanted to last for any length of time in this job and they were both old enough to have gotten used to it all, but Rich had gotten the impression that he and the Pathfinder hand been friends. That always made things more difficult.

Rich wasn't exactly sure how to respond to that. He wasn't any good at this stuff. He supposed a 'that's rough, buddy,' wouldn't exactly help the situation and any reassurances would just sound insincere. They both knew it wasn't technically his fault but that wouldn't stop him from beating himself up over it. Awkward silence wasn't going to help either though and he wanted to do _something_ to help. Too bad his style of coping wasn't exactly healthy. Still, worth a shot.

"I brought some whisky here, pretty much the only thing in my personal effects," he said instead. "Soon there won't be any left in Andromeda. Care to share a bottle or two?"

"Well. I can't exactly turn an offer like that down, now can I?"


	2. Chapter 2

Rich's room was a bit on the small side, but he was fine with that. It had a little sitting room with a coffee table and two armchairs and really that suited his needs just fine. Currently he and Carlyle were reclining in the armchairs with full glasses in their hands and an assortment of alcohol lined up on the table before them.

"Here I am drinking your private supply and it occurs to me that we haven't even been properly introduced," Carlyle said once they were settled and enjoying their drinks. "Richard, isn't it? We didn't get to meet before leaving the Milky Way."

"Please," he said, taking a bigger sip than advisable. "My mother's the only one who calls me Richard and then only when she's angry."

"How about Dick then?" Carlyle asked with a grin.

"Nope, my sister's got that one," Rich said, grinning back. "You'll have to find your."

"Galen it is, then" Carlyle said, raising a glass as if saluting him.

"Fine then, Carlyle," Rich said putting particular emphasis on his last name. "So tell me, what brought you to Andromeda? I saw your credentials, it sounds like you were living pretty cozy back in the Milky Way."

"I guess I just woke up one day and realized I wasn't actually happy," Carlyle said, staring at the bottles before them. Rich got the impression there was more to the story but he certainly wasn't going to pry. "Maybe coming here was a bit extreme but what's the point in half-assing a midlife crisis?

"I hear ya. We're just too old men trying for a second start at our lives," Rich said. "Better late than never, am I right?"

"So you came for similar reasons?" Carlyle asked.

"You don't have to pretend," Rich said, also avoiding eye contact. "You must have seen my record."

"I'd rather hear what you have to say," Carlyle said and Rich tried not to roll his eyes. He didn't know what his own record said, but it can't have been pretty.

"Oh, you know," he said flippantly. "I don't exactly know when to keep my mouth shut, apparently. I'm a bit of an ass if you haven't noticed."

"No," Carlyle said, sarcastically drawing out the word.

"Now who's the ass," Rich said, but he was smiling.

"Hey, you're sharing your whiskey with me. You're good in my book. So, what, you wanted to get away from all the people you've burned?"

"Something like that. My sister wanted to come too and she's the only one willing to put up with me sober, so I figured why not tag along."

"Oh I can't wait to meet her," Carlyle said with a little laugh. "She still in cryo?"

"Yeah."

"Hopefully we'll get to pull her out soon."

They talked well into the night, mostly about pointless things; coworkers, the state of the Hyperion, the neverending bright lights that made Rich feel like he was going to develop a migraine. They'd had quite a bit to drink by the time they eventually fell into a comfortable silence. Honestly, Rich was in danger of dozing off. He thought Carlyle already had until he spoke, his voice quiet, as if he wasn't sure he even wanted Rich to hear.

"At one point, down there on Habitat 7, we were pinned down and I was just- useless. I couldn't seem to get a clear shot off. I just can't help but wonder if they'd had someone who was a better shot with them instead of me, if we wouldn't have lost so many."

"Well, you can't be perfect at everything," Rich said. It wasn't what he'd meant to say. It was a poor attempt at flirting but he couldn't have chosen a more inappropriate time. Rich cleared his throat. "I mean, you've done impressive stuff in the medical field. You can dwell on what-ifs all you want, but it doesn't change the fact that they had the best medic down there with them. For all you know, more people could have died without you there."

Carlyle smiled sadly into his drink but didn't say anything. Rich didn't mean to, he wanted to stay up and do what he could to keep Carlyle company, but this time he did fall asleep. When he woke in the morning, he was sad to see that Carlyle had already gone. He tried to push the mental image of what Carlyle might be like first thing in the morning out of his mind as he rubbed at his burning eyes and fumbled with the clock on the coffee table. He groaned when he realized he had to be at work soon. He didn't have time to grab coffee so he was infinitely grateful when Carlyle passed him a mug as soon as he arrived.

"You're a lifesaver," Rich muttered, accepting it.

Carlyle just smiled at him as he headed back to his station. Rich took a drink to hide his own smile. Things were still probably going to go catastrophically wrong, but at least for now he hadn't immediately alienated everyone around him. And he had something to look forward to for a change. That was new. And kinda nice. Hopefully he'd be able to talk Carlyle into getting another drink with him soon.


	3. Chapter 3

Rich was handed a datapad and was flipping through his new patient's chart as he refilled his coffee mug. When the nurse was done getting the patient situated, Rich headed over.

"Electrical burns?" Rich said before glancing up suspiciously. "I haven't heard of any malfunctions. What have you been getting up to?"

"Nothing, I swear!" the man said. "I was just working on a panel and it exploded into sparks!"

"I guess it was just your lucky day," Rich said. Perhaps he should cut down on the sarcasm. It wouldn't do to freak his patients out even more. He took the man's arm gently and began looking over the burns. "I know it must hurt like hell, but it isn't actually all that bad. Give me a moment and we'll have it all bandaged up."

Rich was deep in concentration when he heard someone behind him ask for Carlyle. He didn't mean to eavesdrop, but they were close enough that he could overhear everything as he worked and he just couldn't help himself.

"Heyes, what can I do for you?" Rich heard Carlyle say.

"I wanted to thank you," a woman said. "For Habitat 7. Probably saved my life. And the new Pathfinder's too."

"Oh, I didn't really do anything," Carlyle replied bashfully.

"You did. I'll never forget how you stood by me when the lighting was gonna strike. Everyone was running for cover except you and Harper. Thanks for that."

"I assure you, it wasn't bravery," Carlyle said dismissively, laughing lightly. "I'm just too old, there was no way I could get out of the way in time. We both owe Harper."

"He a friend of yours?" Rich's patient asked suddenly, pulling him out of his thoughts.

"What? Why?" Rich asked suspiciously, a little disappointed that he missed the last bit of the conversation. The woman was already leaving and Carlyle was heading back to his station.

"Well, you're actually smiling, that's new. And here I thought you were kinda terrifying.

"Oh don't worry, I am," Rich said with a half-smile as he worked. "If you keep burning yourself, you might just find out how terrifying. There, you're good to go. Get out of here and don't spread rumors about me. I have a reputation to uphold."

His patient grinned at him as he left and Rich sighed. Friends, huh? He didn't exactly think sharing a bottle of whiskey was enough to make two people friends, but Rich was annoyed at how pleased the thought made him. He was proud of Carlyle though. For all his talk of letting down the Pathfinder team, of course he was downplaying his own involvement. At least Rich had read him right. He seemed a good man and he was glad to know him. Rich shook his head, trying to focus and push away all thoughts of possibly spending more evenings Carlyle. He had work to do.


	4. Chapter 4

Perhaps it was the sleep deprivation. How long had they been working? It had to have been close to 30 hours. Or maybe it was the adrenaline and stress from working non-stop to save as many lives as possible. Whatever it was, all Rich knew was that he was having difficulty looking away from Carlyle's lips. Carlyle was speaking to him, but he couldn't hear, the entire world felt fuzzy and distant. But then suddenly he moved even closer, a hand coming up to brush the hair out of Rich's eyes in a gesture that was all too intimate, and Rich was thrown back into reality.

"You feeling okay?" Carlyle asked. "What's the matter, cat got your tongue?"

That brought up thoughts Rich certainly shouldn't be entertaining right now, especially about a colleague while standing in Carlyle's quarters, but he was so close and all Rich could think about was kissing him. He knew he should leave, he wasn't even sure why he'd accepted Carlyle's offer to come in for a drink when he wasn't positive he'd make it back to his own room before he fell asleep, but he didn't want to pull away and lose that contact.

"Something certainly has," Rich said, trying not to think about the terrible joke, and then he was kissing Carlyle, pulling him close by the front of his shirt.

It was perfect, everything he had imagined it would be; warm and soft and Rich's eyes fell closed at the feeling of Carlyle's breath across his skin. It was also painfully brief. Rich forced himself to step back, berating himself for his forwardness. He'd told himself countless times that he would not do this. Carlyle looked startled and Rich desperately tried to think of a way of apologizing that might save their friendship from his stupid mistake. As much as he wanted this as well, he didn't want to lose what they already had more.

But then suddenly Carlyle's hand was in his hair and he was pulling him close, kissing him. This time the passion in it was nearly overwhelming as they tried to pull each other ever closer, deepening the kiss as they felt the other's heartbeat from where they were pressed together. Rich wrapped his own arms securely around Carlyle's back, fingers digging into the fabric of his coat, unable to truly believe that this was happening.

Carlyle was leading them back to the couch, Rich realized, and thank goodness for that, really. He'd forgotten how tired he was. With the soft cushions under them, he straddling Carlyle's lap, their movements becoming more lazy and slow, and Carlyle even chuckling into the kiss.

"You good?" Rich asked, brushing his fingers across his cheek as Carlyle leaned back into a more comfortable position, Rich lying against his chest.

"Very," he said, running his hand through Rich's hair again and pulling him back into the kiss.

Rich couldn't exactly remember how it happened, but he woke up lying half on top of Carlyle on the couch. Well, that was awkward. Apparently they had been more tired than they thought. Rich just hoped they'd fallen asleep around the same time and that he hadn't passed out on Carlyle while they were making out. He didn't want to move, feeling Carlyle's arms loosely wrapped around his waist, but his back was already starting to ache in protest. He groaned as he sat up and Carlyle echoed him.

"I swear I wasn't trying to crush you to death," Rich said, chuckling.

"You sure about that?" Carlyle asked, stretching. "Because a few more minutes and the job would have been done.

"Come on, old man," Rich said, patting his thigh before standing. "If we hurry we might actually have time for breakfast before our next shift."

He didn't want to move, he already missed the contact, the warmth, but he couldn't help but suddenly feel apprehensive. They had sort of fallen together last night, but they'd never talked about anything like this. What if he'd read the the signs wrong and Carlyle wasn't actually interested in any sort of relationship? Rich cared about him, he'd rather they remain friends than risk pushing him away. Carlyle sat up as Rich headed for the kitchen to make them some coffee, but he didn't follow.

"This was a mistake, wasn't it?" Carlyle asked and Rich felt his heart sink.

"What, falling asleep on the couch?" Rich knew that wasn't what he meant but he couldn't help but deflect. With the coffeemaker doing it's thing, he turned to the fridge and pulled out some eggs. "I'd say yes, my back is gonna be in agony for days."

"You know what I mean, Galen," Carlyle said with a sigh, uncharacteristically serious. "I'm too old for this. I'm too old for you."

"Are you kidding me?" Rich said irritably, glancing over his shoulder as he started frying up the eggs. "I'm, what, five years younger than you? Besides, all we did was make out. If you don't want to do it again-"

"No, that's not-" Carlyle said quickly before sighing. "I came here because I was alone and there was nothing left for me, no real future. You could still have one and I don't want to take that away from you."

"Harry," Rich said, taking the pan off the stove and running his fingers through his hair as he turned to face him. "You think I was any better off? Why do you think I came here? Seems to me we can either sulk and wither away here or actually try for a life. This is supposed to be our second chance, remember?"

"And what exactly is it that you want?" Carlyle asked.

"I'm too old to play around," Rich said, leaning back against the counter. "I just want you."

"And you're okay with me falling asleep on you all the time like last night?" Carlyle asked as he stood and approached. There was a hint of a smile there and that eased Rich's anxiety somewhat at least.

"Oh thank god, I thought I'd been the one to fall asleep first," Rich said, chuckling as Carlyle stood in front of him, taking his hands. He wanted to wrap his arms around him, but he held back. Rich didn't want to rush, worried Carlyle might not want this after all.

"I can't actually remember either, but I'm happy to blame it on you," Carlyle said with a genuine smile now as he moved in close.

"So, you good to give this a shot or what?" Rich felt much too apprehensive, like he was young again new to all this and it was an odd feeling. He was too old to be this nervous.

Carlyle chuckled a little, resting his forehead against Rich's. "What can I say? I've been wanting to do this since the first day we met."

His voice was so soft, so affectionate that it actually threw Rich. And then Carlyle was kissing him again. There was a hand on his cheek and his chest felt tight with emotion but also so warm. When they finally drew apart, it took Rich a moment to regain his senses and when he did he found Carlyle watching him smugly.

"Since we first met, eh?" Rich said, grinning back. He still felt a little light headed and much too happy. He hadn't thought he was capable of feeling this way for a long time. "That's a first. Normally people would rather punch me."

"I wonder why," Carlyle said sarcastically, still smirking.

Sadly, their next shift was fast approaching, but they did cook the rest of their breakfast together which Rich enjoyed more than he should have. Hopefully the next time they had a moment alone they wouldn't be so exhausted that they fell asleep immediately. Although Rich wouldn't exactly complain if they did. As much as his back ached, he'd still do last night over again in a heartbeat. He just enjoyed Carlyle's company. That was all he needed.


	5. Chapter 7

Early relationship navigation

* * *

Rich was feeling incredibly restless. Lately he'd been spending nearly every evening in Harry's quarters and, while it had been pleasant at first, doubts were beginning to creep in. He'd promised himself that he wouldn't do this again, and yet he'd practically jumped head first into this relationship without a second thought nearly as soon as they'd arrived. And now, here he was, taking up space in another person's life. How long until he screwed it all up like always?

He genuinely liked Harry. He'd liked him from the beginning of course, he just didn't expect the relationship to last as long as it had. Any reasonable person would have dumped his ass long ago, but Harry seemed to have infinite patience. The longer they were together, the more likely it was that Rich was going to ruin his life and at this point he felt like he was just waiting for it all to go bad.

He couldn't do that, not to Harry. But Rich was selfish. What else was new? Every time Harry looked at him, that hint of a smile around his eyes, the deep wrinkles at the corners from how easily he smiled; it made Rich feel things he wasn't at all used to feeling. It was happiness and affection and, while not exactly hope, it at least allowed him to set aside his general gloom for a time and just enjoy Harry's company. And he didn't want to lose that. So, every day, knowing full well that he should break things off before he hurt him, Rich simply held on all the tighter.

Unfortunately, simply waiting for things to go wrong only pushed them more quickly towards it. Rich's restlessness made Harry tense, and their uncomfortable silence only allowed things to fester. Rich could see it happen but he still couldn't help but dodge every serious conversation. Not that that could last forever, of course.

Harry was in the bathroom shaving, towel wrapped around his waist and hair still damp from his shower, when Rich came stumbling in to join him. He hadn't even gotten dressed yet and was just wearing boxers, yawning as he grabbed his toothbrush. Harry paused and simply watched Rich through the mirror for a long moment until Rich raised a questioning eyebrow at him as he brush his teeth.

"What are we doing?" Harry asked suddenly.

"What, like, right now?" Rich asked sarcastically after spitting out a mouthful of toothpaste. "Or do you mean later? Or...?"

"All of this," Harry said, gesturing to the two of them. "This can't work, can it?"

"You probably should have said something before you gave me a drawer," Rich said, eyebrow raised, trying to joke, but it felt like the floor was opening up under him. He hadn't had any coffee yet and he felt like death anyway, hopefully his disappointment wasn't too obvious. He berated himself, he'd known full well this was coming, so why did he feel this way?

"Rich, look at me. Every day I've got more grey hairs, more wrinkles."

"I dunno, it kinda gives you a silver fox sorta vibe," Rich said, shrugging, still desperate to change the subject, but there was no chance of that this time.

"I'm being serious," Harry said earnestly. "All I can hope to do is hold you back. You should be out doing things, having a life, not withering away here with me."

"I don't exactly get out much. To be honest, you're lucky I talk to you at all. Going out isn't really my thing."

Rich hated that Harry was talking about himself like this. He was a good man, strong and kind, and Rich hated that he might blame himself for things between them going south. Harry was a good person, he didn't deserve any of this and Rich hated himself for ever causing him to feel this way.

"Rich, we've been spending so much time together; I don't want to get in the way of your other friendships."

"I don't know if you've noticed but people don't really like me," Rich said too matter-of-factly and that seemed to annoy Harry.

"You're not as unlikable as you make yourself out to be."

"I assure you, I am," Rich said, hating that Harry was trying to defend him. Rich didn't deserve it. He put his toothbrush back in the holder a little too roughly. "I don't even know how you put up with me."

"Right about now, neither do I," Harry said with a huff of laughter. He was joking, of course, but somehow that hurt Rich more than he thought it still could. He was right, of course. This was where he'd been leading things, after all, constantly being difficult. Still, Harry hating him was better than him tearing himself apart. Rich told himself this was how it had to be. He turned away, face stony, and left the room. "Rich?"

He didn't stop. He went into the bedroom and began pulling on his clothes. When Harry followed, he'd wiped most of the shaving cream off of his face and he leaned against the door frame watching him. Rich just tried to avoid eye contact because if he looked at him he wasn't sure he'd be strong enough to do this. He wanted to move closer, to wipe the remaining shaving cream off of his jaw, to kiss him and apologize for being an ass. But this was better. Being an ass now would spare him infinitely more pain if they stayed together. So he kept his face blank and focused on anything else.

"Talk to me, Rich," Harry said.

"There's a pattern with me," Rich said, digging through a drawer looking for his socks. "A pattern with my life. I'd burned all metaphorical bridges back in the Milky Way, I was hoping I'd learned my lesson and would do better here. Connections are… inadvisable for me."

"You mean you came here to live as a recluse and never speak to anyone?" Harry asked, unable to keep the amusement out of his voice.

"Things obviously didn't go as planned," he said, sending a meaningful look towards Harry.

"So, what, you got too attached and now you're just waiting until you piss me off enough that I break things off?"

"Wouldn't be the first time."

"Are you kidding? It's me," Harry said incredulously. "Do you really think I'd do that?"

"I am not a good person, Harry. I'm sarcastic and petty and cruel. I do what I can as a doctor not out of the goodness of my heart but because it pays well and maybe somewhere along the line I'll do enough to at least quiet the guilt. Maybe this was a mistake. I don't do relationships."

"What?"

"Let's face it. Even this was selfish," Rich said because it was cruel and he knew it would hurt him. "You're attractive, your company is enjoyable, and I was desperate for any sort of human contact. You were just convenient."

"You can't mean-"

"You know me better than anyone. Surely this isn't a surprise. I'm a selfish bastard and I always will be."

Harry was too stunned to reply so Rich took the opportunity and pushed past him before he could recover. Even as he hurried out and down the corridor, Harry's face, looking so hurt, was burned into his vision. As soon as he found himself in a fairly secluded hallway where he was unlikely to be disturbed, he collapsed against the wall and slid down to the floor, the ache in his chest so great that all he could do was bury his face in his hands. He didn't have the right to be so upset. He'd brought this pain on himself, on both of them. He deserved it for what he had just done to Harry. He told himself it was for the best but even that was more selfish lies. He never should have gotten involved with him to begin with. No matter how hard he tried to be a better person, he would always be the same self-absorbed ass he always was.

* * *

The medbay was thankfully empty this late at night so Rich made his way back back to the cryo pods, knowing exactly where to go. He'd memorized which one his sister was still held in stasis inside. He'd come here often just to sit beside her and pretend she could hear him. Today, though, he had no words. He leaned back against her pod and covered his face, trying not to feel anything at all. He wanted to tell Lise that he'd fucked up again, but that wasn't really a surprise, now, was it? He was good at fucking up. If she were here, she'd buy him a drink or suggest they go somewhere new and leave all the hurt behind, as if that were even possible.

How ironic that she'd suggest they come here, to Andromeda, the ultimate of "going somewhere new to start over." And Rich had already fucked that up and she wasn't even awake yet. She'd be better off without him; everyone would, really. He was only capable of screwing up, of hurting the people he cared for most. He slammed his fist down against the ledge he was sitting on. It didn't do much to relieve the tension but he deserved the pain that radiated through his hand.

"Now now," a familiar voice called out, echoing slightly in the open space. "Don't hit the pods, what did they ever do to you?"

Rich flinched. It was Harry. How had he found him? And how can he sound so casual after what had just happened? He had his hands in his pockets, seeming perfectly calm as he moved to stand on the floor blow his ledge.

"What do you want?" Rich wasn't sure what else to say. It came out harsher than he'd intended and he winced again.

"Your sister?" Harry asked, nodding towards the pod and ignoring his question.

"Yeah."

"Nice of you to visit her."

"I doubt she cares," Rich said, glancing up at the pod. "It's not like she's awake for it."

"Still," Harry said. "It's the thought that counts."

"You don't know my sister," Rich said with a little laugh.

Harry watched him for a long moment and Rich glanced away, guilt churning in his gut.

"You were right," Harry said at last. "I do know you better than anyone else here, your sister excluded I'm sure, and I know what you said back there was bullshit. Do you want to talk about it?"

Rich sighed. "I owe you an apology at the very least. I know I said some awful things. Not all of it was bullshit, though. I'm not a likable guy."

"And yet, I do," Harry said, adding a muttered, "for some reason."

That stopped Rich. He was so sure he'd ruined everything like he always did. Why did Harry still like him? Why was he still giving him a chance?

"I suppose I owe you an explanation," Rich said with a heavy sigh. "Things got- pretty bad for me, back in the Milky Way. I wasn't in a good place. My boyfriend at the time, I told him he needed to go, but he still stuck with me. Idiot should have gotten out while he could. I ended up ruining his life as well as mine. He was a good man, he didn't deserve any of that. By the time we finally broke it off he hated me, which I guess was what I'd intended. So, success I guess?"

"So everything you said back there, you were trying to get me to hate you?" Harry asked, eyebrow raised.

"Trying to get you to leave before I have a chance to ruin your life too," Rich said, studying his hands.

"And here I thought you were getting antsy because I'm the most boring man in Helius," Harry said with a little chuckle. Rich felt annoyed that he wasn't taking this seriously and Harry waved him off. "Don't give yourself so much credit. You couldn't ruin my life even if you wanted to," Harry continued and Rich couldn't help but shoot him an incredulous look. "Do you know how close I am to retirement? I'm on easy street from here on out."

"Right," Rich said, scoffing a little as he looked away.

"Just get down here so we can go home and talk this out."

"You can't be serious," Rich snapped, looking at him again. "Were you not listening to everything I just said?"

"Look, I get it, I do," Harry said, rubbing at his forehead. "You thought this was inevitable and tried to hurry things along. I'm not exactly innocent here either. In a way I was pushing for this as well, thinking I was too old for you. But we're both adults and can make our own decisions. If we both agree to actually use our words and stop trying to make decisions for each other, I don't mind giving this another shot.

"Seriously? Just like that?"

"Rich, we got in a fight, it happens. I'm not gonna drop you just like that. As long as we can learn to communicate, that is. Well, and as long as you stop acting like such an ass, you 'selfish bastard.' Now get down here and let's get back."

"That part was true," Rich said, studying his hands guiltily. "I am selfish. I'm actually considering it, after all."

"Then I'm selfish too," Harry said with a small, fond smile. "Now come on."

Rich had said a lot of terrible things to him. He wasn't sure he could ever make up for it. He had tried so hard to be better after everything that happened in the Milky Way. All this just showed him how far he still had to go. He couldn't believe Harry was even interested in associating with him anymore, but if Harry really wanted this, he owed it to him to try at least, and to work harder to be someone Harry would be proud of. Rich studied him for a long moment before he hopped down and the two of them headed back together. They had a lot to talk about, but maybe Rich had found someone as stubborn as himself. Maybe they had a chance after all.


	6. Chapter 5

"Rich, hold on!"

Everything was a haze of pain, jumbling everything together. Rich could remember the mercenary that'd tried to hold them up on their way to deliver supplies to the Elaaden settlement. And he remembered thinking of all the people who would die if they didn't get the supplies there. He'd acted without thinking, really, trying to jump the guy when he was distracted trying to bag as much of the medicine as he could. Unfortunately he hadn't been as distracted as he'd hoped and Rich had ended up with a bullet for his trouble. At least that'd given Carlyle enough time to get a shot off as well.

"Rich, can you hear me?"

"Harry?" He blinked, trying to focus, vaguely aware that he was lying on the ground on his back. "You don't normally call me by my first name. Must be pretty bad then."

"And you just called me Harry," Carlyle pointed out.

He was busy doing something, but Rich couldn't tell what. Probably bandaging him up, stopping the blood flow. Rich felt too hot and cold at the same time and all he wanted to do was sleep but he knew that would be a bad idea.

"I'm getting slow in my old age," Rich said. He tried to laugh but the sound came out strangled.

"I need you to stay with me," Carlyle said. He sounded surprisingly calm. He always did when things were bad and Rich was proud of him for it. But he could still see the concern in Carlyle's eyes. He was barely keeping it together.

"Yeah, I thought about going for a walk, but you're right, I'd better stay here for a bit," Rich said.

"It's a bit warm out," Carlyle said, still working. "How about we go for a walk later, hmm? It should be cooler in the evening."

His voice was so soothing, so gentle. It was like his usual doctor voice, but different somehow. It was special, so full of affection. He didn't use it very often. Sometimes it was difficult for Rich to really express how he felt. Joking was easier. Harry knew that and respected it. When he spoke to him like that, Rich thought he might fall apart it was so kind and soft. It made him realize that he didn't tell Harry how he felt nearly enough. He groped blindly until he gripped Harry's arm, causing him to stop and lean in closer, a hand brushing across Rich's forehead and cheek.

"Rich?" he asked questioningly, concern evident in his voice.

"I love you," Rich said. "Harry, I love you."

"No," Harry said. "Don't you dare-"

"I'm sorry, I should have told you sooner," Rich began.

"Well, now you can tell me later, after we get you patched up," Harry said, getting back to work on his wound. "You're not allowed to die after saying something like that, you got it?"

"Yes sir," Rich said.

He tried to hang on, he really did, but he could feel darkness pressing in. He heard Harry calling his name again and he did his best to focus on that, but eventually the darkness engulfed him.

Rich groaned. Everything hurt and he couldn't seem to get his body moving. When he forced open his eyes he found Carlyle leaning over him.

"About time," he said fondly, looking relieved. "How do you feel?"

"Like hell," Rich said. "Maybe you shoulda let me die. Can I get some painkillers?"

"Sorry, max dose," Carlyle said, turning his attention to Rich's bandages and checking his vitals. "You can have more in an hour."

"Can you knock me unconscious instead then?" Rich asked hopefully. "I'm too old for this, remind me not to get shot again."

"With pleasure. You do it again I might just let you die."

"Hey," Rich said suddenly, voice more serious and Harry stopped to look at him. "I meant what I said. Before I passed out, I mean."

"And here I thought you were delirious," Harry said, but there was something there, a trembling at the edges that betrayed his light tone.

"I love you," Rich said, bringing a hand up to rest against Harry's arm. The intensity of emotion he saw in Harry's eyes was a little overwhelming and Rich couldn't help but look away, babbling in an attempt to lighten the mood. Why was he so bad at this? "I probably shouldn't have saved it for when I wasn't bleeding out on the ground, but ya know-"

Harry leaned down and kissed him. It was gentle and brief but Rich still closed his eyes, savoring the feeling. He was so soft, so warm.

"I love you too," Harry said, voice impossibly fond and Rich just stared at him wide eyed for a moment.

"Really? I mean, I am a huge ass, after all. I mean, I probably shouldn't be trying to talk you out of this, please tell me to shut up."

"Shut up," Harry said, still smiling and his voice still so tender. He ran his fingers through his hair before pulling away and finishing his check up. "I need to go oversee the unpacking of the supplies we brought but I'll be back soon." He paused a moment, kissing Rich's forehead. "I'm glad you didn't die."

"I guess I am too," Rich said. "Thanks. For saving my life."

"Don't thank me until you get the bill," Harry said, winking as he turned to leave.


	7. Chapter 6

Rich woke to the feeling of someone gently twisting locks of his hair between fingers. It was so soft he was surprised it had even woken him up at all. He was going to lay there and enjoy it, but instead groaned to cover up a smile. He cracked one eye open, glaring up at Harry who was leaning on an elbow as he watched him.

"What do you think you're doing?" Rich demanded.

"Playing with your hair, what does it look like?" Harry said smiling at him.

"You're making a mess of it," Rich said, closing his eye again.

"Oh I'm so sorry, I didn't realize your bed head was so intentional. Let me just stick it all back up for you, then."

Rich groaned but couldn't bring himself to swat his hand away. He didn't actually mind being woken up this way and he couldn't care less about his hair. It just seemed like the thing to say. Honestly Harry running his fingers through his hair felt nice. It was soothing. He probably could have slipped back into sleep again if Harry haven't spoken.

"You know, I told someone once that I came here so I could wake up and feel something other than arthritis."

"And?" Rich couldn't help but ask. Why did he feel so apprehensive? "Do you?"

"Yeah," Harry said, "I do."

He leaned down and kissed Rich on the forehead, the gesture incredibly tender. It was a little overwhelming to be honest.

"Yeah, I feel it too," Rich said. "Gastrointestinal distress. Next time I'm picking the restaurant."

"You ass," Harry said, laughing as he shoved him a little.

"Fine, I'm kidding," Rich said, hiding a smile as he pressed in close against Harry's chest, feeling his arms wrap around him. "I love you too, but that could change if you keep waking me up so damn early."

"Right, I forgot how important your beauty sleep is," Harry said, chuckling. "I'll just go put some coffee on for when you decide to grace the world with your cheery presence."

"Nope," Rich said, gripping Harry tightly when he tried to disentangle himself. "You're stuck here. This is your punishment for waking me up."

"Fine, but when I get hungry I'm getting out of this bed even if I end up dragging you with me."

"It's so tempting to take that as a challenge," Rich said, grinning.

"Hurry up and go back to sleep," Harry said, trying and failing to suppress a laugh.

It was nice, waking up like this. Waking up to Harry. And to think Rich had thought Andromeda would be an ending. He suppose it was, to some extent. It ended his life in the Milky Way, it ended all of that baggage and the loneliness. But it was a beginning too. He had a life here now. He had Harry. And he was happy.


	8. Chapter 8

"I'm not going."

Halloween wasn't Rich's least favorite holiday, but it certainly wasn't up there either. Sure, he always appreciated an excuse to get drunk, but usually the parties were boring and the costumes were stupid and he would really rather just stay home. He just couldn't fathom why Harry wanted to go to some party their coworkers were putting on.

"Yes you are," Harry said, not even bothering to look over at him as he adjusted his victorian-style jacket in the mirror. Admittedly, he did look pretty good in that outfit. "We won't be there for long and you don't even have to talk to anyone. You can just stare at them until they go away, I know how much you enjoy that. Come on, there's even an open bar."

Rich thought about it. "Fine, but no costume."

"It's required. Now hurry up and get ready."

Rich shot him a withering look, muttering darkly under his breath as he went into the bedroom, coming back out only a few minutes later.

Harry finally did look up and gave Rich a look. "You're just wearing my clothes. That's not a costume."

"Yes it is," Rich said. "I'm a nerd."

"Try again," Harry said sternly but his eyes betrayed the smile he was attempting to hide.

This time Rich came out wearing his normal clothes along with his lab coat.

"Seriously?"

"What?" Rich said innocently. "I'm a sexy nurse."

Harry chuckled, shaking his head. "Fine, okay, close enough. Now let's go. We're going to be late."

"Oh what a shame," Rich said deadpan as he followed, but was glad Harry found him more amusing than difficult.


End file.
